Future Family’s Input when Planning your Engagement or Wedding

Have you ever stopped to consider the valuable resources your family or your future fiancée/wife/husband’s family really are? Families are a great source to learn about cultural traditions relating to weddings and engagements. In fact, you may even get a family heirloom to pass down to your future spouse/fiancée. Additionally, if you are entering a culturally diverse marriage, it may be a good idea to learn about customs in your future family with respect to engagements and wedding ceremonies. Not only will you score big points with your future in-laws for taking an interest in their history and culture, but your future fiancée/wife/husband will appreciate the fact that you took the time to learn a little more about him/her.

Gift Basket or Gift Bag Proposal Idea

So you may have a special lady who you’ve decided needs proposing. Unfortunately, you just don’t know where to begin. How about creating a gift basket/ gift bag engagement proposal? Now, this idea requires a lot of planning, but she will be so surprised. First, try to order things that would be interesting. Does she like chocolate? If so, consider ordering some personalized M&M’s with either “Will you marry me?” or each of your names on them (ex. Henry & Matilda). They can be ordered online and personalized with your message. Next, does she like candles? Yankee Candle allows personalized message candles to be ordered which you can have the same or similar messages. If you are really confident, you may even want to think about a “She said yes!” message on your candle. Finally, make sure you have the ring, but don’t include it in the package. Get a separate small gift bag and put it in there. make sure you hold on to it and keep it out of sight.

After you have all of these items, wrap them individually. Place each in a small box or wrap them in tissue paper. If you can’t wrap, you can even place them in small gift bags. You will need to write “Open first, second, third” on each individual tissue paper/bag/box. You may want to start off small, with the M&M’s for opening first, then progress to the candle for second, and leave an empty box/bag marked “Open third/last”. Inside, you can either put nothing in there and then ask her to marry you, or if you will be nervous, you can put a pre-made recording of you (either audio or video) with a note that says “Play me” on it. This way, you can ask her to marry you. Finally, when she says yes, pull out the “bonus gift” of the ring.

Beach Wedding Vows: Make and Take Your Memories

If you are planning a beach wedding, how about making and taking a souvenir with you so you will always have a visual reminder of your special day? First, you will need to have a class container with a lid engraved with either your names and wedding date on it, or you can even have the most memorable line from each one of your vows engraved on it. Next, after each couple has recited his or her vow, take some sand and deposit it in the bottle. You may even want to put the lid on it and shake it to symbolizing two different hands of sand intermixing and becoming one. Adding sand is also recommended for family vows where children are involved in the process. If so, you may want to add everyone’s name on the bottle along with the date. Check with a local glass shop or engraving shop for these containers. With a little planning, a glass-blower can even customize your glass’ color to match the colors used for your wedding theme.

Wedding Day Ideas: A creative way to carry your vows

Have you ever wondered where can you store your vows on your wedding day should your memory fail and you need to have a hard copy as your back-up version? Here is a unique idea: what about carrying them on your flower arrangement? First, you will each need to write your vows down on a paper 3” by 5”, but no larger than 4” by 6”. Next, you will need some simple supplies sold at any craft store. Purchase 2 floral picks with wires and 2 “fake” wedding rings. Roll each vow into a scroll shape and place a ring around it. Now, take the floral pick and wire the ring to the floral pick and secure each to your wedding arrangement. Be sure not to wire the scroll, only the ring, as you don’t want a hard time trying to un-secure your vows. You may also want either two unique rings (one gold, one silver), or you may want to write your name on the outside of the scroll, to denote each person’s vow.

Additionally, make sure each scrolled vow is firmly placed and arranged so it looks like part of your arrangement, and not something that shouldn’t be there.

More creative ideas in future postings.

Family Proposals: Getting the children involved with the proposal

For relationships where either parent has prior children, or those born during the relationship, getting the children to accept the “new parent” is important. One of the ways to help make kids feel involved is to have them involved with the proposal. For younger children, a t-shirt with the “Will you marry my mommy or daddy?” will most likely work, but what about pre-school and higher aged children? A great idea is to take a family portrait with the parent and children and present it to the future fiancée. To dress it up, you can frame it and have a plaque engraved with the “Will you marry us?” on it and the date of the proposal. Also, you can have each child read a “I want you as my mom/dad because….” at a family proposal if the children are accepting of the future spouse.

Look for more interactive family proposal ideas in future postings.

When you just don’t know what to say…..

have someone else say it for you. With all of the overwhelming emotions a bride or groom goes through before their Wedding Day, sometimes, writing or memorizing Wedding Vows gets pushed down on the priority list or due to wedding-related stress, often times people have a mini “mental meltdown”. I know on the day I got married, I felt like I was in a fog and couldn’t remember a thing! Our justice read the vows and I just agreed to them. Mind you it was a spur-of-the-moment decision to get married (like we decided and were married in an hour), but even with months of planning, it still happens.

So what can you do? Have a back-up plan. While you may not want to go the route I had of someone choosing your vows for you and just agreeing to them, consider selecting a poem that summarizes and expresses to your partner how you feel about him/her. Suggest that he/she find on also in the event that you may be too busy or stressed to tackle those vows. In a crunch, having something to say is a lot better than standing up there, feeling like you are about to pass out, with nothing to say. You may not pass out, but, if your experience is anything like mine was, you may not remember a thing.

Emergencies can happen on your Wedding Day: be prepared for them

So what happens if you feel like you are going to faint or feel ill when you are asked for your vows? That would be your “Plan B”. Make sure your Pastor or Justice of the Peace knows how you are feeling, and if in the event you aren’t doing well, he/she can either read your vows for you or can read some selected text.

Also, if there is a particular passage (Bible, Torah, Koran, etc. ) that you’ve selected, that can be read by them, as well. Have a “gesture” or understood symbol to signify that you need him/her to read or select vows for you. I know it may not be something that you want to do, but if you are squeezed into a Wedding dress on a hot day with the air conditioning broken and standing in one place, chances are you may end up feeling more motivated to have all the help you can get.

If doing a family vow, you can also select a representative from the family to read and select and alternate. Your health is most important, and as long as you are able to become someone’s husband or wife for life, that is what your Wedding Day should be all about.

Family Vows and Young Children, ….Can This Work?

When coming into a blended family marriage (one where there are children involved), often times family vows are said. Family vows are where parents and step-parents recognize each member of the family (both current and new members) and where children and step-children do the same. The purpose of the family vows is to include everyone in the unification process, to promise things to each other as a family, and to recognize the individual’s role in the family. But… what do you do if the child/children are too young to know what is going on?

If a child is too young to participate in family vows, ask your pastor or clergy (if using one) to perform a family blessing right after the ceremony. This is the time when it is usually done, or in some churches, when a family unity candle is lit.

Creative Ways to Have a Long-Distance Proposal (Part One)

Ok, so I have been thinking about some really creative ways to propose to your girlfriend/boyfriend while you are separated by distance. The first idea that comes into my mind is to order a really sparkly faux ring from one of the shopping channels and have it shipped to him/her. On the message card, have something like “this will have to do until I can give you the real one in person, will you marry me?”

Another idea is to give him/her an Ipod or MP3 player pre-loaded with his/her favorite songs. Make a .wav recording of your proposal and “sneak” it in there along with the songs. When your special person listens to it, they will be unexpectedly surprised. Of course, you can always design a custom cover to drop “hints” about one of the “surprise songs” inside.

Last for today, what about an Edible Arrangement? Order one shaped in a bouquet and have it shipped to your love one. On the card, you can write how that person will be needed another one made out of different kinds of flowers in the near future if he/she will do the honor of becoming your husband/wife. If you wish to do this for a man, instead of ordering bouquets, order an edible boutonniere.

Look for more creative long-distance proposal ideas soon.

Long Distance Proposals… Are they as successful as in-person ones?

If you are in the military, work on different Coasts, go to school in different countries or for any other reason you are geographically separated from your future fiancée and are ready to propose, you may be a little hesitant to ask him/her to marry you do to the fear of rejection. You may feel that it is necessary to look into his/her eyes, hold his/her hand, or execute your orchestrated production that you have been planning to do for months, but in reality, sometimes that can’t happen.

If you truly want to ask that special person to marry you, go for it! Chances are you are going to get a yes with about the same probability over the telephone as if you are sitting on the couch in the same room. If he/she really wants you, it is the offer that counts, not how it is done! Trust me, my husband is in the military and getting married was suggested over an email (by me, of course) while he was out to sea. Four years later, we are still going strong. However, if you are looking for some creative ways to ask that other person to marry you and you can’t be there, be sure to check out tomorrow’s posting for some creative ideas on long-distance proposals.